Asking for Forgiveness

I am so blessed to be a parent. I learn something everyday! Not because I'm awesome and always get it right the first time, or that I apply all the knowledgeable information I read in parenting books. No. I learn so much from my 3 year old!

The other day Ava spilled her water on the floor in the living room, having an evening snack and movie. She quietly walked into the kitchen and with the biggest eyes and softest voice I heard...

"Daddy, do you forgive me?"

We were confused at first, and then she added the bit about the water spill.

Another instance (because there can never be just one), Ava had ripped the gas bill to shreds and stuffed it in a little box that she laid on the table (there really wasn't a need to freak out because of the internet these days and how everything is online, but I just like to hold paper in my hands while I still can). As soon as I opened the box I heard...

"Do you forgive me?"

My heart melted both times. I searched my memory bank trying to recall where she heard those sweet words. Where has she seen it? From whom did she learn it? Unfortunately, and regrettably, I am a poor teacher. I am still trying to say "I'm sorry." My "sorry's" are drawn out with no eye contact and maybe the words are being said through gritted teeth more often that not. Very rarely do I add, "Do you forgive me?"!

She learned all about asking forgiveness from her father. Not because he sat her down one day and said this is going to be our lesson for today. No. He taught her by the way he lives, the way he loves her mother, and the way he loves her. Her father is quick to say "I'm sorry" without gritting or looking away. She has a great model of the Gospel and Christ's love for us and others.

We are both so blessed to have such and amazing man of God in our lives. And you will be comforted to know that my "sorry's" aren't as torturous as they once were. Little children aren't the only ones who are teachable.

Grievig Italy

Wesley left for Italy on Monday. Surprisingly I am not as upset as I thought I would be, partly because I have already grieved over every scenario possible.

From the moment I found out Wesley would be going to Italy, I cried. I cried hard. Every. Day. I cried for the things that could happen to him (that probably wouldn’t). I cried for the places and people I wouldn’t see. I cried for the lack of control I had for his well-being (for some reason I felt I could make sure the pilot was as careful as he could be just by being a passenger. Hilarious, I know). I cried for the food I wouldn’t get to eat.

I grieved.

I grieved for a lost husband that I still could hold. I grieved for a little girl who wouldn’t know how great her father is. I grieved for the culture I wouldn’t see. I grieved for the people I wouldn’t get to hug (I love to hug and cuddle, and I hear Italy is the place to go if you love being close to people). I grieved for the History I wouldn’t see and feel with my hands. I grieved for ridiculous (some more than others) reasons.

I prayed.

I prayed Philippians 4 every day. I read Philippians 4 every day. I wanted that passage to be ingrained into my being. I wanted to only think about Jesus’ peace. I wanted only Jesus’ peace. I wanted Jesus’ strength. I needed Jesus’ strength.

When the time came to drop Wesley off at the airport I thought I would lose it. I thought I would need to pull over and cry because I wouldn’t be able to see the road. I thought I wouldn’t be able to breathe from snot bubbles bursting (this happens to you too!). I thought I wouldn’t be able to eat or enjoy anything this week.

I was wrong.

I was wrong about everything. Jesus sent His peace. I took all of my worries and prayed about them. It was (and still is) the most amazing feeling. When I dropped him off I was fine. Fine. Not one single tear dropped from my eyes. It was amazing. It was freeing. It was peace. It was Jesus.

 

^“6 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. ⁷ And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus… ¹³ I can do all things through him who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:6-7, 13

 

 

Luxuries: The (almost) impossible one for me to give up

I read an article the other day about how to cut your grocery budget in half. The article caught my interest and got me thinking about food luxuries. I never thought about cheese, honey, or good coffee being luxuries! These were always in stock at my parent’s house growing up so I never thought twice about these items when creating a grocery budget for my small family of three.

*Side Note*

Growing up I never learned how to create a budget; my parents were always there to give me what I needed. I had a small part time job but when I was going to school they paid for everything. I was extremely blessed to have such great parents! But I had no sense of a budget or how to go by one, so when I got married and started my own family with our own budget, it was a rude awakening for me.

*End Side Note*

This morning as I was eating my biscuit smothered in honey, I started thinking about that article (and the fact that I am running low on honey-shucks!). I was thinking about how hard it would be to give up honey. I was thinking about how sad that little bear’s face will be when I don’t get him out of the cupboard as much. I was thinking about how much I love honey. I was thinking, “is this a product I can stuff into my grocery budget?”

Having a budget has made me more conscience about how I spend money. For instance, when we go out to eat and spend $20+, was that Chinese take-out really worth it (okay let’s get real- Chinese take-out is always worth it!)? In all seriousness, there has been a time or two (or twenty) that I could’ve used that $20+ plus to get a week’s worth of breakfast or lunch food.

 Not only do I love honey, but I am rather fond of cheese and not just block cheese, all kinds of cheeses! [According to the article] Cheeses are also luxury items when it comes to groceries, so we cut back from buying five different cheeses to two (Colby and mozzarella) and the savings are substantial! I can use those cheeses for the things I cook the most. I encourage you to take an inventory of your groceries and see if there are any ways you can save! (I wasn’t able to find the article so I could post it for you- sorry!)

So, after much consideration and staring at that cute honey bear face, I have made the decision that honey is a luxury that will no longer be a luxury but a staple in our pantry.

 

 

 

Mirror Mirror

Ava takes any chance she can to look at herself in a mirror (a little something she learned from her father).  The other day while sitting on the potty (with no success) she asks for my hand mirror. After a few minutes of talking to herself, she gets tired of holding the mirror and in slow motion I see the mirror fall to the floor. I unfortunately was too slow (shocking, I know) and the mirror shattered. I didn’t have the heart to tell her that is was 7 years bad luck, so I just told her 7 minutes (what child really has a concept of time anyway). Meanwhile I am still serving my 42 year-bad-luck sentence. If my parents were as brilliant as me… I would have been “free” 41 years 364 days 23 hours and 18 minutes ago.  

What have I married into?

A recent conversation Wesley and I had about his favorite holiday.

Me: “Are you going to plant a tree for Arbor Day?” If any of you knew Wesley is college, he was a non-showering-frisbee throwing-tree hugging-hippie. Jokingly, asking him if he was going to participate in the “hippie” holiday, as I like to call it.

To my surprise he responded,

“Yeah, I think I will. I like Arbor Day. I think I am going to plant a Japanese maple.” I don’t know why I was surprised.

Me: “Hey I love Japanese maples! They are so pretty!”

Wesley: “They look a lot like weed…”

Me: “NO they do not! They have a burgundy color and have pretty leaves… they don’t look like weed leaves.”

Wesley: “I know what a Japanese maple looks like, we had them in our backyard when we lived in Columbia.”

Me: “Then you should know that they don’t look like weed leaves!”

Wesley: “Have you ever seen a weed leaf?”

Me: “Well, no. Have you?”

Wesley: “Yeah, we had them in our backyard when we lived in Columbia.”

What have I married into? The drug Cartel family perhaps…

*Clearly, Wesley was joking and I don’t know anyone who is involved with the Cartel, and even if I did, I wouldn’t tell you… I might get shot…

I remember the day I wanted to look older... but today is not that day...

Wednesday nights, like many church communities, is the night for band practice, choir practice, and/or youth group. REVO’s youth rGroup, following tradition (REVO is not a traditional church in the least), meets on Wednesday, recently the kids ministry, specifically rTheather (where I volunteer on Sundays), is working with the youth on Sunday mornings to act out the Bible stories for the little kids (Pre-5^th grade). Therefore I go to youth group on Wednesday to help them practice their lines, etc.

A wonderful REVO-family, the Marshall’s, opens their home to the teens and pre-teens and feed them every Wednesday! What amazing families we have here at REVO!

I was in mid-Manwhich bite, when a pre-teen, puffed out his chest oh so proudly and stated,

“Well I’m 12…”

Me: “I remember when I was 12… That was like 30 years ago!”

Obviously joking…

Pre-teen: “You’re 40!?”

Another teen, older therefore I thought wiser, interjected,

“You look more like 30.”

Apparently I thought wrong…

After chewing, swallowing, and digesting the previous comment at the same time my stomach was digesting my bite of Manwhich… I calmly lost it.

“WWWHHHAAATTT!?!?!?! You think I AM 30!?!?!

Not-wiser teen: “What? Are you older?

Clearly she thought I was flattered by the “low” number she threw my way. I was on the verge of crying. Not only was I mistaken (seriously mistaken I might add) for a 30 year old, that was the lowest number she could come up with… That is as young as I was going to get?! Come on!

Me: “But I am only 22…” as my eyes are desperately searching for an anti-depressant. At the same time, I am thinking about all the money I spent on Mary Kay products. The same products that make me feel like I look young (the same) and refreshed… but in reality, I age by 8 years.

Awesome.

Ringing in the New Year

Now that the hustle and bustle of the holidays are over and all that implies, lets ring in the new year with lists of goals of which we shall never achieve or at least we won’t get to them in the same year we set them. Well this year it is not going to happen to me… again. I am going to take my resolutions very seriously.

Here is my list for the year 2012:

1.       Keep my blog up to date!

2.       Finish a few crafts on my list.

3.       Learn to sew.

4.       Get the family scrapbook in order ( I am a couple years behind).

5.       Find a publisher for my book!

I look forward and hope to achieve many, if not all of my resolutions on my list. Why not surprise yourself and put something on your list you have been dying to do or finish. You will be satisfied when you mark it off your list as complete!

Happy New Year everyone!